#caughtonNestCam. https://video.nest.com/clip/6e5fc82d06444178afc3d7a31b5a301d.mp4

I’ve always had a hard time putting myself out for judgment on social media. I’m a very private person and I overthink every like, or even more so when I think I’ve been snubbed by someone who I care what they think. I realize this is how communication happens in this era, and especially in this time of pandemic.

Watching the documentary “The Social Dilemma” cemented my preexisting notions.

I feel inadequate when looking at acquaintances seemingly exciting and opulent lives. It “looks” so picture perfect, and my life is exhausting, great, sad, happy, frustrating, just human. I know some of my thoughts are irrational, but again I’m human.

Although in the video above you see my mom hugging me, what you don’t see is she doesn’t know who I am. She cannot function in her ADL’s and needs help with eating, toileting, getting dressed, going to bed. She cannot even turn off her own lights, or know what a blankets function is, among every other object she picks up. Its so hard to see her fade away and be totally dependent. It frusterates both her and I.

Published by KaGardn1

I'm trying to live the most meaningful and intentional life possible. Minimalist, Vegetarian, Fierce protector of a full night sleep, Mother, Wife, Daughter -caretaker, Sister, Friend, Nurse. Sharing day to day life with family and friends. A quest to minimize effects of Alzheimer's Disease. View all posts by KaGardn1